Monday, March 16, 2009

Somethin' ain't right

Decent night's sleep Saturday - up bright and early for the Shamrock Run on Sunday. A bunch of us TNTers did the 15k. It was incredibly rainy and windy, but I worked up a good sweat so at least I was warm. I had deep concerns about this run because I was unable to run on Friday due to shin splints. I was pretty sure I would not be able to finish - maybe even not start, but once I got rolling yesterday, I knew that I would cross the finish line. Did about 2 miles in the pool last night and was SO ready for bed when I got home. Up early with dear sick boy again. Finally took him into the doctor since he started complaining of ear pain. Double ear infection :-(

So, I usually don't talk too much on here about my troubles as I tend to think they are much less troublesome than other people's troubles. BUT, as my title suggests, Somethin' ain't right...and it hasn't been right in a long time and I just don't know how much longer I can take it. Not just one thing, but many...and I feel like this place I'm in is never going to end. I know what you're thinking... pray about it, have faith, learn whatever it is I'm supposed to be learning and all those things that I know I'm supposed to do...but today I feel defeated and I can't stand it. I guess I can "take it" for as long as it lasts and I probably will "take it"...but it plain sucks and I can't get past that today.

Do you guys ever read the NieNie dialogues on my side bar? She is an amazing woman with an amazing story. Read back through her blog if you can. You won't regret it.


QuilLight said...

I know you know what to do, Julie, but sometimes life does overwhelm. Satan roams these lands looking steal, kill, and destroy, and we are his target. You are not alone, and you have allies willing to fight with you and for you. :)

Also, don't apologize about sharing the hard stuff in your life. Sometimes that can really help. And, sometimes other can help even if it's just specific prayer.


Visionquester said...

Hi Julie,
I think you are amazing for all the physical things you do. When you say, "something ain't right," then "something ain't right."

The only thing that has EVER helped me was to "Give In" and quit fighting it. Quit trying to keep my head above water so to speak. The only action I have EVER taken that has helped was absolute inaction as odd as that may sound.

I submit to the depression (if that's what it is) and go back to bed... You can only spend so many days in bed before you absolutely have got to do something else.

I open myself up to God and let Him take care of me and he always does.

What typically happens is that I will lay there asking myself questions. As if someone else were asking..

What is wrong? You don't know? What if you had to guess? What do you think will help? What is it that you REALLY want? What do you think you need? What values are you in conflict with? Etc...

It was my best shot at trying to help you Julie.. but honestly the only thing I can do is to pray for you.. and I will.


Julie said...

Thanks for your support and prayers and thanks, Anna, for your wisdom. An Elephant huh? I think you know your stuff.