Sunday, October 25, 2009

The Sauna

"Mama, isn't it amazing how many fun things you can see on a nature hike? I bet Daddy wishes he was here instead of laying on the bed watching football."
"Oh, never mind. That's probably not right at all."

Well, despite being daddyless ~ the kids, dog and I had a great little hike up at Powell Butte. We saw Ki dive into the deep grass for snakes and such about 1,000 times. We even got to see her have a beauty of a sneezing fit when she got something up her snout BUT GOOD! We debated if we should collect the "golden mushrooms" off the fallen tree to take home for soup (uh NO!) and the kids found their favorite fallen tree with it's massive root system.

We head home and then I head back the gym:

The pool is full when I get there. Not full of actual swimmers but one lane of a guy doing very wierd movements that might have been swimming, but I could never really figure it out. Regardless, he was taking up a whole lane. Middle lane had two guys that would swim one length and then stop and talk for 5 minutes until realizing I was still glaring at them and then they would swim another length before stopping for a talk break again. Third lane had two women bouncing on their toes. Just bouncing...and bouncing and talking and bouncing, oh...and twirling sometimes. I finally decided to stop fuming and plopped into the suana.

People are so weird in the sauna. You see people who don't own toenail clippers, people who practice Lamaze breathing (even though they are men), people who probably don't use any other part of the gym other than this small hot room. Tonight was no different. Now, I admit that I read these books by their covers, however when approached in conversation by them, I usually realize they are people just like you and me ~ they just are not afraid to let their craziness show.

I sat there with such a horridly stuffed nose, wondering if anyone could smell how much hummus I devoured at lunch. As I tried to breath (gasping quick, even breaths through my mouth as my nose would not work) I took in my friends around me. Two Russian women were rubbing sea salt and baking soda ALL over their bodies. It made me feel a little dirty sitting there watching. The guy next to me had a shark tooth necklace (bold statement at his age) and was "sharing" his ipod music with us. He had flip flops on and he shared a dripping wet thwop thwopping to the tune. As he beat out the song, the wet hair of his legs slapping against his palms make a slorp slorp sound. I don't think he even knew, but the sounds were thunderous to me. As I saw a "normal" person heading through the door, I tilted my head to them with a big smile only to have him catch my face and then whip his head away from me. Weirdo. I decided it might be time to lift a finger to my nose to make sure it wasn't running, only to find a stream of thick snot running from nostril to lip.

I wonder if I am the weird mouth breathing woman who sits in the corner grinning with a big snot slug sitting on her upper lip.


Melissa H said...

Gee, you make the gym sound so appealing. I wonder why I work out at home? ;-)

Love the pic of Jack and Mai in front of the fallen tree! And, too bad for Daddy. He missed out on a memory. ;-)

Julie said...

I know, isn't it weird that I actually love the gym?

Daddy's missed out on A LOT of memories, unfortunately for him and the kids - But...I don't think we're going to change him.